Letting go………

To every thing there is a season….. and a time to every purpose under the heaven. (Ecclesiastes 3:1)

I thought of that verse this morning……  I was thinking about “letting go”. There comes a time when one just has to LET IT GO!!!  There’s a time for that…..and perhaps it depends on what one is “letting go of”, but some of us are better at it than others.  But honestly….. what part of LOGIC would make one want to HOLD ON TO —— THIS!!!!! 

I sometimes am just baffled by my husband!  Anybody tracking with me?  Well, let me tell you my story…… I’m married to a man who pitches pretty much NOTHING!  He didn’t come thru the Great Depression (albeit his Daddy did, and I think the teaching and mind-set of all that was pretty strong)  But thankfully, we have lived in a time-frame of plenty.  We’ve never wondered where our next JACKET is coming from!  We have plenty of jackets!  Carl’s had jackets given to him his entire adult life…… you know, like from various companies and vendors who have their logos on their jackets and they pass those down to contractors and builders and the like.  Free jackets!  We’ve just never had a shortage!  So WHY?  WHY in the name of all that’s logical, does Eddie Bauer have such a hold over our closet?!!  We’ve never even met him!  Is he even still alive? Did he ever even exist? I don’t know what he looks like!  I’m willing to let go!  And yet, Carl sent this treasured jacket of his into the laundry this week, along with two or three others and a hat or two.  (does anybody else out there have to launder their husband’s ball hats?  Again….. these are freebies that have names on them of lumber companies or insulation companies or the like!)  But I digress…… I’m on my high horse over JACKETS!!!

Well, I washed his load of jackets, and dried them, not even inspecting any of it (apart from the pockets….making sure there weren’t nails or ink pens or little blocks of wood….which he tends to use instead of a notepad!!!)  And so it wasn’t until it was post-dryer time and I was hanging it all back up that I actually LOOKED AT 👀 this Eddie Bauer jacket.  I was HORRIFIED!!!  I thought to myself, has he actually been wearing this thing?  There literally is barely a square inch of it that hasn’t been affected by the passing of time!  

Well, I made a management decision today.  I am, after-all, the Laundry Queen….. my family has declared me such.   

And so with the authority that comes with said title, I plan to pitch this thing.  It’s lifetime has come to an end. 

But within all this jacket ponderment, and along with our son-in-law’s birthday which is today, and along with the ponderment I’ve had over the funeral of a friend’s brother-in-law, which is today, my mind has been a whir…….about this thing called TIME, about this matter of “letting go”! 

I was reading Psalm 90 earlier this morning……. maybe that’s where all this began brewing in my mind……

In this Psalm, Moses is pondering life….. he’s pondering “his time here on earth”, reflecting back……

v.1 Lord, you have been our dwelling place in all generations.  v.2 Before the mountains were brought forth, or ever you had formed the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.  v.3 You return man to dust and say, “Return, O children of man!”  v.4 For a thousand years in your sight are but as yesterday when it is past, or as a watch in the night.

I tell you someone else who pondered Psalm 90 (besides me and Moses!).…..  Isaac Watts!  He penned, from this prayer of Moses’, “O God our help in ages past, our hope for years to come”…… which happens to be my favorite!  Down thru the years, it has become my prayer of despair — my prayer of crying out.  I wonder if it was this for Isaac Watts when he wrote it.  I wonder if it was this for Moses, the one who first penned these cries to God……. 

Moses, the man whose life started in despair — a baby put afloat in a basket to escape death;

Moses, found by an Egyptian princess and raised in opulence; 

Moses, running for his life as a fugitive; 

Moses, called by God back to Egypt to bring His nation out of bondage; 

Moses, who saw God’s miracles and hand of provision; 

Moses, who saw God’s hand of discipline; 

Moses, who spent his last 40 years wandering in a dessert with a group of complainers;

Moses, who got to launch the next generation as they were going into the promised land;

Moses, who stayed behind;

Moses, who died but was not buried — whom God instead took, burying him Himself; 

Moses, who had 130 years on earth — hard years — but years where he saw God ever faithful.  

It’s thought that Moses penned this prayer of Psalm 90 during those 40 years of wandering in the wilderness — Moses, who never really had what one could’ve called his own dwelling place, his own home.  This Moses came to see that God Himself was his dwelling place…  v. 1 Lord, you have been our dwelling place in all generations.

Lord, You were Moses’ dwelling place, You were Isaac Watts’ dwelling place, and You are mine……  in all generations.  Sometimes I think each generation sorta thinks “life began with me” —— “we” are our point of reference.  But YOU are the eternal one, the true point of reference; You…. who were God before there was even an earth!  You, everlasting God, who brought forth the mountains as You formed our earth and world!  

Our time here isn’t the focal point.  It’s actually a very brief journey, compared to eternity ever after — even a thousand years is (as Watts said) “like an evening gone, short as the watch that ends the night before the rising sun.”

As I think about “despair” and those things that cause such (be it for Moses or Isaac or me)…. things like unsettledness, dealing with people, worn out “jackets”, legal matters, death….. all these type of things that rise up in our brief time here…. they really sorta pale if we hold them up in front of us, looking past them ….. keeping our eyes ever focused on our true dwelling place, our true home — that place where security, peace, and assurance lie — that place that is WITH YOU, O God!

That place where you “sweep them away……….”

v.5 You sweep them away as with a flood; they are like a dream, like grass that is renewed in the morning: v.6 in the morning it flourishes and is renewed; in the evening it fades and withers.  

Life is temporary — life is fleeting.  Life is hard — our sin is great — God sees — God knows — we should fear — Lord, teach us to number our days!

Moses also knew about God’s anger — he had seen His anger without (against their enemy Egypt).  He had seen His anger within (against the Hebrews themselves for making a golden calf, against them for grumbling about manna, against Nadab and Abihu for unauthorized fire for sacrifices, against his sister Miriam for thinking higher of herself than she ought!   And Moses himself was living under God’s hand of judgement…… stuck wandering for 40 years in the wilderness with these rascals.  And come to find out, Moses himself is a rascal — prevented from accompanying the grumblers on into the promised land.  Moses knew sin (just like we do) and he had seen God’s hand of judgement over sin……

v.7 For we are brought to an end by your anger; by your wrath we are dismayed.  v.8 You have set our iniquities before you, our secret sins in the light of your presence.  v.9 For all our days pass away under your wrath; we bring our years to an end like a sigh.

Sigh…………Then Moses gives somewhat of an assessment of life — it’s short, it’s troublesome, God sees and deals with, so help us be smarter, Lord — give us wisdom — teach us to number them —

v.10 The years of our life are seventy, or even by reason of strength eighty; yet their span is but toil and trouble; they are soon gone, and we fly away.  v.11 Who considers the power of your anger, and your wrath according to the fear of you? v.12 So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.

Lord, help me to have a mindset and a view beyond myself, beyond my perceptions and opinions.  I pray to have the mind of Christ, to see Him and the gift He is, the rescue He is, the deliverance He gives with such Grace.  Give me the wisdom to seek You, to believe You, to obey You, to follow You, to fear You.  And as I encounter the residual damage of ours, a fallen world, help me to remain faithful, remain steadfast, and trust the “more” You are always up to.

And so Moses ends his prayer, asking God to relent~   asking God to return~ asking God to make them glad for as many days as He afflicted~ asking God to satisfy them with Himself ~ with His steadfast love!  

Oh Lord that we, of Your world 2025, would have our true satisfaction in You.  We are such a fickle people, such a people of insatiable appetite for the world and it’s trappings. O that I want YOU — only YOU! 

v.13  Return, O Lord!  How long?  Have pity on your servants!  v.14 Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.  v.15 Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, and for as many years as we have seen evil.  

In closing, Moses prays for this group of people that he’s been leading and for that next generation — that God would show His work and His power to them — asking for God’s favor upon them and that He would establish the work of their hands —

v,16  Let your work be shown to your servants, and your glorious power to their children.  v.17 Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands upon us; yes, establish the work of our hands!

I think about what that would mean or what that would look like, if the work of my hands (all that I do) was established by You.  That word “established”……. 

….set up by You.  

….founded by You.  

….You lay the groundwork.  

….You enact.  

….You institute.  

….You bring about.  

….You place.  

….You build. 

….It’s all Your doing…..

Lord, as I look at our world and the despair therein, the helplessness, the inability we have to turn anything around….. I pray our world would look to You and desire You…. not just desire Your fix.  I pray we would see how pitiable we are in ourselves.  May we cry out “Relent” and may our appetites change.  May we be truly satisfied in You.  You are ever enough.  You were for Moses….. You were for Isaac Watts…..  You are for me.

And as I ponder all of this, perhaps I, too, should relent! It is, after all, just a jacket! Maybe it should get to live one more year in our closet!